GetBackers -Shuura no Gag Dou Part 3

English Translation:

Shuura no Gag Dou
Kakei Juubee Mushashugyou
Daisanbu- Ten no Maki
Kenketsu Hen
Part 3

Music Playlist at MixPod.com

Notes from the translator:
Once again, I remind you that this script is meant to be read along with the drama, or at least knowing what the actual drama sounds like. Hearing the voices is as important as knowing what they're saying, and sometimes more so. Besides, why wouldn't you want to hear these bad jokes first hand?
As with the previous part, lines that wouldn't be funny at all in English are translated idrectly with the original line left in. Such lines are mostly jokes featuring rhyme or alliteration or something like that. Also, beware the bad puns.
Suffixes left untranslated include -san, -kun, -sensei, and -dono as well as Emishi's -han, which is just -san in Osaka-ben, his dialect.

The term Easterner is used here to refer to a native of Eastern Japan, or Kantou, as opposed to Kansai, Western Japan. The differences between these regions are large in terms of manner of speaking. Also, people from Kansai are generally held to be funnier than the rest of the country.


Fighting on the path of Gag - Kakei Juubei’s Samurai Training - Third Part - Chapter of Conclusion

Narration : Having unexpectedly set foot into the top line Underground gag technique, Juubei had a fateful, eye-opening encounter with Emishi Harukinojo. Juubei’s new days of training have begun.

Juubei : *Training* Nagai mono ni amake no ni! Ninja minna de nan nin ja? Arumikan no ue ni aru mikan. Waiyaa hata no wa dare ya wa ya? Haa! (When it’s long, it’s going to rain! How many of you are ninjas? Mandarins grow above the trunk. Who’s that beside me?)
*Normally* So this is inspiration from the overworld... How refreshing. It’s as if it were penetrating my heart.
*resumes training* Fish survival makes for tasty survival.
Emishi : The old fisherman seems unsteady...
Juubei : *splashing* You called, Harukinojo-sensei?
Emishi : I take it your recovery is going well?
Juubei : Yes. I have preformed many numbers lately. All thanks to the gift of your instruction. I have realized that my heart had been stolen by the path of darkness. I have much to atone for.,
Emishi : You’re too young to expect not to make mistakes.
Juubei : I will focus until my hair falls out.
Emishi : That’s good. Well, later.

Kazuki : Juubei, I’m glad to see you return to an honest path.
*He notices something* Look out! An arrow..!
Juubei : *Hit* Ugh! No.. Nothi... Not bad, no arrows... Argh!
*recovers* That was close! It almost broke my spirit. This attack came from... No way!
*rustling paper* Is this arrow-mail? *reads* The Top Line does not forgive traitors. That person will come to drive you beyond hell itself. *crumples the note*

Juubei : Harukinojo-sensei, I must depart. Since I came to be here I have been nothing but trouble to you. Once one has set foot in the dark world, one cannot return to life in the surface world so easily. This is fate, as ordered by the error of my ways. I shall be sure to bring defeat to the Underground Gag.
Emishi : Hold it.
Juubei : Harukinojo-sensei.
Emishi : Can you really defeat those three? Is the top line going to fight you seriously?
Juubei : I do not know. However, I will face the consequences should I fail to defeat them.
Emishi : Hm. I guess nothing I say will stop you. At least let me give you a parting gift. Remember this well : Pon Pero Harehere Hoyame Hyon!
Juubei : *Laughs a lot*
Juubei : What is this technique? Had I heard any more I surely would have died!
Emishi : Well, it’ll beat your opponents.
Juubei : Thank you very much! *leaves*

Emishi : *to himself* But when the time comes, will you be able to use that technique against those three?
*louder* You over there, how long were you planning to hide?
Kazuki : So you noticed my presence.
Emishi : Don’t just stand around here. Right now, Juubei-han needs someone like you.
Kazuki : Thank you very much. *runs off*
Emishi : Hmm.

*Water noises in the background*
Juubei : Aah. Hot springs are never lacking while travelling. If were to leave this bath, I could see the capital. Yet I have no intention of leaving...
*Splashing noise*
Juubei : Who is that?!
Kazuki : Juubei, it’s me.
Juubei : *surprised* Kazuki?! You, still...
Kazuki : Juubei, stop your fight with Underground Gag.
Juubei : What are you saying?
Kazuki : I have a bad feeling about it. I don’t think you’ll win against that Akabane Kuroudo, Juubei. I’m afraid to lose you, Juubei.
Juubei : Kazuki..
Kazuki : It’s still not too late. Let’s go home. We could live together, quietly. Isn’t that enough?
Juubei : I cannot do that. You haven’t forgotten have you? Avenging my lord... I still haven’t... and if I don’t, there will be no one else. Here I swear to destroy Akabane Kuroudo!
Kazuki : But!
Juubei : Please understand. I swore to my lord that I would protect you.
Kazuki : Juubei...
*Sudden splashing*
Akabane : I do not apologize for intruding on your watery privacy.
Juubei : Damn you!
Kazuki : Akabane Kuroudo!
Akabane : Hm hm. It has been a while.
Juubei : Let him go! This doesn’t concern Kazuki!
Akabane : There is a connection. A large one.
Juubei : What?!
Akabane : You shall vanish. *Scalpel sound*
Juube i: You two! You were alive?
Ban : Hah. A hot spring’s no place to get any backup.
Ginji : Sorry, but you’re gonna die.
Juubei : Keh.. Sutoomu ga suto.. (Storms are su...)
Ban : *Cutting him off* Super Violent Stomach Rumbling!
Ginji : Electric Roar of Laughter strike!
Juubei : *laughs very hard, falls into the spring*
Kazuki : Juubei!
Ban : Keh. That’s a good look for ya.
Juubei : *Still laughing, somewhat insanely*
Akabane : My, you aren’t dead yet. Shall I send you to heaven? *Slice*
Juubei : Argh! *More laughing*
Akabane : My, still alive. *more slicing*
Juubei : *continues laughing*
Kazuki : Juubei! Hang in there!
Ban : Hehehehe, he hasn’t got a chance.
Akabane : Just how many smiling marks will it take?
Kazuki : Juubei! That technique! Use the technique Harukinojo-sensei gave you! Hurry!
Juubei : *still giggling, then recovers* Let’s go! Harukinojo-sensei mysterious sure-kill attack! Pon pero!... Pon pero... Popopo pon pero!... Why? Why won’t the rest come?
Akabane : For an Easterner like you that technique is impossible. Now it’s time to sleep. .
Kazuki : Juubei!
Emishi : Pon pero harahere homere hyon!!
Akabane : Damn you...
Emishi : Hara pori hire pora hara poro hire pora!
Akabane : *Cannot hold back his laughter, collapses with a splash*
Ban : Hang on!
Kazuki : You are!
Juubei : Harukinojo-sensei!
Emishi : I was a bit worried and came to have a look. Good thing I did.
Juubei : So you came out here because of the trouble I caused you. Even your instruction did not suffice for me to succeed. I deeply apologize.
Emishi : I only wanted to see you two happy. And safe above all.
Juubei : Sensei..
Kazuki : Thank you very much.
Akabane :*cackles* So you came after all... Joker of Fresh Blood.
Kazuki : Eh?!
Juubei : What did you just say?!
Akabane : Once, warriors stormed every road bringing great calamities about. The House of Infinity.
Kazuki and Juubei : Ah?!
Akabane : The actual work was done by the Joker of Fresh Blood, this man Emishi Harukinojo.
Kazuki : That can’t be!
Juubei : Do not speak nonsense!
Akabane : Remember well what you saw.
Emishi : *echoing like a flashback* Para poro hero hohero hyon!
Juubei : AAH!
Kazuki : Ah!
Akabane : Hehehe. Our objective is the same, Joker of Fresh Blood.... *gasp*
*Big splash*
Ginji : Sensei! Akabane-sensei!
Juubei : Harukinojo-sensei!
Emishi : It can’t be help now that you’ve found things out. Kazuki-han? Go gently and die!
Kazuki : Aah!
Emishi : I thought I’d take Kazuki-han and do some delicious things but... it turned out Akabane-han was here so that thinking stopped.
Juubei : Why? Why do you target Kazuki?
Emishi : That’s the one thing I won’t answer. Well, now die. Pon pero hara hemo herepi hyohen!
*Juubei contains his laughter*
Emishi : Hara hiro peere horamuhyo here here!
*Juubei laughs a bit*
Emishi : Hara hiro peere hogougo hogu hogussu! Hogussu!
*Juubei laughs out loud and falls into the hot spring*
Kazuki : Juubei!
Emishi : Hn. The match is done.
Juubei : Sorry... Kazuki... In the end I was not able to protect you.... Hurry... Finish me.
Kazuki : Juubei!
Emishi : Still being alive after my attacks is proof that you were truly my student. Pon pero..!
Kazuki : *interrupting* Wait! I’ll protect Juubei!
Emishi : Wha’d you say?
Juubei : Kazuki... Stop, you’ll be killed!
Ban : He...
Ginji : No way!
Juubei : Kazuki...
Kazuki : Let’s go! Behold my technique!
*Cheesy music begins*
Kazuki : *singing* How do you write the ‘ka’ in Kazuki? On an old manuscript the old-fashioned way!
Juubei : What the...
Kazuki : *singing* How do you write the ‘zu’ in Kazuki? On an old manuscript the old-fashioned way!
*Barely restrained laughter*
Juubei : What madness is this?
Ginji : This is... A show of force?
Kazuki : *singing* How do you write the ‘ki’ in Kazuki? On an old manuscript the old-fashioned way!
*End music*
Juubei : Someday, this surge will...
Emishi : *Bursts out laughing and collapses*
Ban : This... must be... what sensei... talked about!
Emishi : Fuuchoin clan’s ultimate melodious sure-kill attack strategy.... That technique must be... the one-string ideal! This is what I was seeking... I’ve seen it all!
*Emishi laughs madly, joined by Ban and Ginji. All three collapse*
Juubei : To think that technique could do so much.
Kazuki : Since it could, I didn’t want to show it. Well, let’s go home, Juubei .
*Slap*
Juubei : Instead of protecting you, I was protected. Now I cannot possibly keep my promise to my lord. I will definitely learn to use that strategy. Until then I cannot go home!
Kazuki : Juubei!
Juubei : Farewell, Kazuki!
Kazuki : Juubei! Then, I’ll teach it to you! Juubei! Juubei!!! The ‘juu’ in Juubei is a good match!!

Narration : Some things in this world are unique. How do you write the ‘jin’ in ‘wakou doujin’ (young man)? Ah! The red, red sun is blazing. When will the day come for this young couple to obtain happiness? And the day when youth reaches the heavens.. That is the miso soup the gods drink. The gods’ miso soup. Only gods criticize. And the gods only know. The rest is up to you.

Juubei : How do you write the ‘juu’ in Juubei? On an old manuscript the old-fashioned way. (Repeat until fade)